No pain, no gain.

Pain.

According to the National Institutes of Health pain "...is a feeling triggered in the nervous system. [It] may be sharp or dull. It may come and go, or it may be constant. You may feel pain in one area of your body, such as your back, abdomen or chest or you may feel pain all over, such as when your muscles ache from the flu."

They go on to describe that pain can be beneficial, as it helps you identify and treat a problem which may have otherwise gone unnoticed.  Once the root cause is addressed though, the pain usually goes away.

Wonderful.

You may be wondering, "Why is Elder Horowitz talking about pain right now?"

I thought you would never ask.

I have had the opportunity to experience pain over the past couple of weeks.

No, not a spiritual pain for the sins of the world, not the mental anguish of sin, just your regular, everyday, old-fashioned, physical pain.

In VERY large amounts.

Story time:

I have a history of pain in my legs. That history came back to haunt me about a month ago...(Yes, I know, it's quite the delay but I am also working as a full-time missionary, which takes a lot of time.)  Throughout that day, the pain in my knees had been getting steadily worse. I took some ibuprofen and hoped it would go away or lessen to a more manageable level, like it usually does.

But it didn't, it got worse, till I couldn't bear it any longer. The pain felt like tiny knives jabbing underneath my kneecap every time I moved.

Which resulted in me having a late-night ER visit with one of my companions.

Not fun for him. I have picture evidence!~

Long story short:  I spent eight hours in the ER for a 20 minute visit, a couple x-rays, and for them to tell me I needed to see an orthopedist.  A week later, my appointment with the orthopedist came through and he told me I had Patellar Tendinitis.  Something which indicates poor muscles around the knees, which might explain the whole 'chronic knee pain' thing.

Well, if nothing else, it was a good experience and I managed to talk to a few people about the gospel!~

Thinking back on it, though I'm still feeling some pain in my leg, there are many ways this character building experience can be applied to the gospel, but the one that I would liken it unto would be this:

Repentance.

That's a big word.  It's a scary word for some people.

But it's not supposed to be.

Pain can follow a variety of different paths but when we sin, we feel guilt for what we have done.  I like the way that a certain Elder put it in his medical parable (which is beyond compare) that you can read here,

"Sin is the medical term we use for both the cause, and symptoms of 'Imperfectia.' The first time you exhibit an imperfect attribute, behavior, or tendency, and allow that to influence your decisions, it is a sign of a spiritual malfunction that is inherent with humans. In short, when you give in to weakness, and either do something wrong, or fail to do something right, it damages your spirit and the scar tissue causes you pain. This pain is known as "guilt."

"I feel fine now though, are you sure it isn't gone?", you respond.

"Unfortunately, it's not that simple. With something like high blood pressure, which can be triggered by a lack of exercise, its effects can be reversed when you begin exercising again. But once you've contracted Imperfectia, you cannot be cured by resuming a good life. Unless every element if imperfection in you is eliminated, your spirit will continue to have occasional failures, which will in turn lead to more pain."

Though sometimes, I feel like I've gone beyond, the pain reminds me that it's still there.

If it's not treated by repentance, confessing and forsaking said sin, then it festers until it becomes a gaping wound. 

Unless I start ignoring it, thinking, "It's not too bad, I can manage with this."  The sin holds me back and eventually, I forget about it.  I begin changing my thinking to accommodate,

"This is normal"

"This is the way things are."

The pain which was once NOT normal, which I had avoided, becomes a part of me and I begin to not want to part with it. It becomes part of my identity and I don't know what I would do without it.  I become dependent on it.  It becomes my crutch.  I no longer am free and I hobble around yelling to everyone, "This is the way I am!"

Sometimes, life forces us down, shoving us to the ground.  We feel like our enemies surround us and we have absolutely no way out.  Occasionally, all we can do is let ourselves be taken down.

I remember, this one video game, Final Fantasy VII: Crisis Core the main character Zack Fair was trying his best to save a friend and get back to those he cared about.

***Spoiler Alert*** (If you care)

"Those wings... I want them too..."-Zack Fair

He succeeds in saving his friend, yet he gets critically injured.  He'd been trying so hard to become a hero to his friends and those around him, but life had shut him down.

As he was lying there dying, he saw his mentor, teacher, and friend, Angeal(who had died previously) flying in the sky.  All he could do was look up and say, "Those wings... I want them too..."

*** End Spoilers ***

When we're on our back, we look upward, seeing those who are free and, like Zack, we want that freedom.

We want to be free from the confines and the constant struggle of trying to survive(At least that's how I feel sometimes).  For me that freedom is found in the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

"Every soul confined in a prison of sin, guilt, or perversion has a key to the gate. The key is labeled repentance. If you know how to use this key, the adversary cannot hold you [down]. The twin principles of repentance and forgiveness exceed in strength the awesome power of the tempter."  -Boyd K. Packer  "Cleansing the Inner Vessel"

Because we are imperfect, in this life we have pain, and we can either let that pain rule us and force us down a path we don't want to go, or we can learn and grow from that pain, trying to forsake our sins and bad habits and become better than the man(or woman) we were yesterday.

When we use the Atonement of Jesus Christ to turn that pain into progress, we take advantage of an infinite power source to carry us further in our own goals.

Yes, I know, this is meant to motivate us to work out, but I would liken it to spiritual growth.

That guilt we feel doesn't need to hold us back. We can learn from it, forsake it, then flex our spiritual muscles and prepare to fly. We don't need to be earthbound. We're children of a HEAVENLY FATHER.  Why let our sins and our pain hold us back?

I admit, sometimes, it's not that simple. There are some things which we cannot change, there are some things which are natural or inborn, within us...

But do we give in to our desires? Do we throw discipline out the window? If our physical muscles are screaming for relief but our workout set isn't done, do we stop?

Or on the flip-side, if my knee is damaged do I keep using it as I had, before it is healed and risk further injury?

If there's anything that I know I have a testimony of, it's that Jesus Christ has felt everything that we have and can help strengthen us in our weakness if we let him.

All we need to do is ask.  

If you feel like you are too unworthy to ask, too scarred by past mistakes, too far gone, or even just scared for whatever reason, remember this little quote from one of our Apostles,

Taken from his talk, "Like a Broken Vessel"

To Learn more about Jeffery R. Holland, click here!~

To learn more about Boyd K. Packer, click here!~

There is always a choice...

When I was younger (Age:9-12ish) and getting angry, I used to yell at speak very politely with my mother,

"You're making my ANGRY!"

"I can't make you do anything," she would respond, "that's your choice!"

Looking back, I've come to appreciate the fact that, though we may not have much control over the circumstances we are in, we always have choices, no matter the situation.

That small lesson from my mother had lasting consequences.

I know that because of that, I can choose for myself how I react, even if the situation is not in my favor.

Even if the world seems like it's falling apart.

Even if my body is fighting against me.

I have a choice.

This is a chance given to me by my Father in Heaven.

My choice is to get up when I feel down, to continue when all seems lost.  I want to keep going, to keep moving, I don't want to stay still and admit defeat.  I don't want to be beaten by the natural man, my internal voice which says, 'I can't'.

Sometimes it's a battle, sometimes, an easy victory, but every step forward is in the right direction.

I know that my Father in Heaven has given me the opportunity to change, to choose and if we truly want it bad enough, we can move forward because,

If we want to progress.  We can push on.  God will always put at our fingertips resources that we can use to change ourselves or use so that we can continue to progress.  We just need to look around us.

If we want to.  That's the wonderful thing about the plan that our heavenly father has given us.

Even if we no more desire to change and/or progress, our Heavenly Father will help us find the proper tools.  There's a scripture that I think about whenever pause to ponder about change/progression:

"...behold, if ye will awake[!] and arouse your faculties, even to an experiment upon my words, yea, even if ye can no more than desire to believe, let this desire work in you, even until ye believe in a manner that ye can believe..."  -Full Reference-

If we believe that we can do it, or at the very least try to believe, it could happen! (Believe in the me that Believes in YOU! [A gold star to whoever gets that reference])

I'm not saying that every challenge can be overcome by pure willpower or the resources that God puts at our disposal.  Sometimes, we have to simply endure.

Just like Elder Richard J. Maynes said in his speech, The Strength to Endure,

"Many of the challenges we face in life can be solved and overcome; however, others may be difficult to understand and impossible to overcome and will be with us until we pass on to the next life. As we temporarily endure the challenges we can solve and as we continue to endure the challenges we cannot solve, it is important to remember that the spiritual strength we develop will help us successfully endure all the challenges we face in life." [Emphasis Added]

By enduring our Earthly Trials, we grow spiritually.  We become more than we were before.

I guess one of the tricks of life is determining which trials are the ones that we can change and which ones we can't.

A mental illness or chronic disease is one of those things that I don't think you can change, regardless of how much you rely on the Atonement of Jesus Christ(which is there to help strengthen us anyways). As I heard a fellow missionary recently describe it,

"Jesus is not some magical repairman who you call when something is broken(whether it be physical or just the situation).  He is our Savior and Redeemer."

We can call on Him when we are in trouble, it's true, but he is with us from the beginning and will strengthen us to face our problems way before it even comes to the point where all we have left is Him.

I'm not a physician or a psychiatrist so I'm just relying on my own perceptions (so I could be wrong), but from what I've seen is that God gives us trials based on us individually. They are very personal to us, and are there to help us become stronger and learn to rely on Him.

Because we've overcome those trials and gotten stronger, I think it must be Human Nature to want to help others surpass similar circumstances.

We want to help others who are going through those hard times, but we can only see their troubles through the filter of our own experiences.  That doesn't mean that we do not have something constructive that could help them and their problem.  We most certainly could but everyone is different(If only just a little bit)!~

We don't know their thoughts, we might only be seeing the tip of the iceberg, for all we know, they could be fighting the hardest battle of their life.

That's why I think it's important that we do not compare our individual trials to another persons.  It can lead to thoughts such as, "Why is this so hard for me when others can do it so easily," (for those undergoing said trial) to "Everybody else is so weak, I went through it and I'm fine!" (for those undergoing a similar trial, but past it with little effort).

From what I've seen, the best help someone can give is just listening, giving support, and being there for someone. (Of course, everybody is different so that might not work for someone else; Remember the Languages of Love!)  Sometimes, well-meaning advice can be harmful without us realizing it.  We might not have a grasp on the entire situation.

I really like the way this comic below portrays advice given without fully understanding the situation, (I think it was specifically made with reference to Depression)

Personally, I think advice is always welcome[!]~ but sometimes it's important to try and see it from another point of view before passing on the advice...

To Conclude:

I know that we have a choice.  It may not be a choice that we like, but it's always going to be there. I know if we are in too much pain, we can cry out to our Heavenly Father and He will send help.  He wants us to succeed in this life and in the life to come.

I do know that we can look up during our trials, our personal tests, and search our hearts for the answer,

because we are all Children of our Heavenly Father[God] and he will never leave us comfortless.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Complimentary Video Excerpts from Jeffrey R. Hollands' Talk :  "An High Priest of Good Times to Come"

Repentance

My name is Matthew Hart.  Whether or not you know me, you and I have some things in common.

Of the many things we may have, I will just list a few.

• We both are Children of God

• We both make mistakes that make us sad and separate us from our Heavenly Father and true happiness.
• We both have a Savior.  He loves you and will wrap you up in His arms of mercy as soon as you repent.
• We both need to repent.

What is Repentance?  To me, it is an opportunity to Come to Jesus Christ and and take the heavy burdens off my shoulders.  Matthew 11:28-30 is a scripture I love about how Jesus Christ helps us lift our burdens.

Repentance makes me feel all better.  After tasting something disgusting, Spit it out!  Use Mouthwash!  Make your mouth Clean.  Sure mouthwash might sting a bit while shwishing and gargling, but your mouth says "thank you for giving it a fresh, clean feeling just as your soul does when you repent.

Repentance might be needed even if you haven't done anything bad.  Just like a car needs maintenance, or teeth need to be brushed, clothes need to be washed, and carpets need to be vacuumed, our souls NEED repentance consistently.

In Washington DC, and the area surrounding it, there are many trees.  During this time of the year the leaves change color.  I often find myself in awe with how beautiful the trees are and how marvelous God's creations are.  Then I think about what it must be like for the trees.  If trees had feelings, maybe during autumn (or fall), they might be frustrated, upset, or depressed.  They worked all spring and summer developing their leaves only to have them fall off again.  One by one those leaves fall until the trees don't have any more leaves. They might feel embarrassed, cold, naked, hungry, lonely or unloved.

All that work to make those leaves... was it all for nothing? could it be that trees make leaves only to lose them? No way José!  When a tree loses its leaves, it has room to grow new ones.  Spring comes and trees bud and blossom and they make new leaves.  I think trees have been around long enough to have positive attitudes about the need to change, adapt and grow.  We should see repentance as that opportunity awaiting us to improve.  Although we may have to give up something good first, as we repent, we can trust God will return to us something better.

Repentance is not really changing who you are, but finding out who your Heavenly Father intends you to be, and acting on that.

Repentance is becoming who you divinely invited to be.

It's kind of like what Mufasa says to Simba in the Lion King.  

"You are more than what you have become." 

Simba is awakened to his potential and his responsibilities and repents of his slothfulness, and commits to do his Father's will.  2 Nephi 9:45

Repentance is coming unto Jesus Christ and renewing our commitment to follow Him.  

2 Nephi 31:10-12, 15, 19-20

Okay so ALL of 2 Nephi 31 is fantastic, and I invite you to read it, because I LOVE IT!

The principles of Repentance and enduring to the end are weaved together.  You need one for the other to work.  Jacob says that after we repent we should Cleave unto God.  Jacob 6: 5, 8-9, 11-12

I will now say a line quoted often by Christians worldwide. 

"Jesus Christ died for us."

There it is in its beautiful simplicity.

Is this true?  If it is true, what does that mean?  Am I saved?  Is there something I need to do to accept His Atoning sacrifice?   ---   These are some questions of the soul concerning Salvation.

The role of Christ in our life:  Alma 7:11-13

We have our ability to make choices and we have the ability to choose to rely upon Christ's Atonement.

Lehi, a prophet from the Book of Mormon around 580 BC says this about choices:  2 Nephi 2: 27-28,30

How do we choose Jesus Christ's sacrifice on our behalf?  First, we must believe or have a desire to believe until that desire grows into Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.  Alma 32: 21, 27

Then! Alma continues on to say, Repent and keep the commandments.  Alma 7:14-17

I will say more concerning Baptism in a later blog post.  For now, I will say repentance prepares us for Baptism, and Baptism is our first covenant we make with God, and it is the way to receive a remission of our sins.

Trust in the Lord enough to have faith in Him enough to repent.  He knows much more than we do.

Proverbs 3: 5, 11-12

This is a video of leaders from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints that everyone should watch.

Patience: It's a virtue for a reason

"Go forth among... thy brethren and establish my word; yet ye shall be patient in long-suffering and afflictions, that ye may show forth good examples unto them in me, and I will make an instrument of thee in my hands unto the salvation of many souls."

-Full Reference-

Patience has been something that I've struggled with my entire life.  I want to keep pushing forward, I want to keep improving myself as fast as I can.

Most of the time, that's not in Gods plan.  FALSE!

God realizes that if I improve as fast as I want too, I would be very, very, very, tired...

 King Benjamin(a prophet-king from The Book of Mormon) talked to his people about this.  I'll 'liken' this scripture to how I read it when I need a reminder to slow down,

"...See that [improvement is] done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that [you] should run faster than [you have] strength."

-Full Reference-

Improvement has a cost-
Trials.  Time.  Pain.

Even when we exercise, we're tearing muscles to make them stronger.  When we go through trials, we're trying our Faith, to make our spirits stronger.

Something that has always helped through these times of trouble is the fact that I can always go in prayer to my Heavenly Father.  I can talk with Him.  I can ask for help.  I can tell Him what I'm feeling.

Like any loving Father, he knows what's going on, but he still wants to hear it from us!

I also found that serving/helping others is a GREAT way to help me feel better.  It just gives you that warm tingly feeling!

Over time, I have learned that patience with our Father in Heaven and trying to understand why He would allow us to go through trials is a way to thrive while going through our tribulations.

This Mormon Message is a great uplifter and it's helped me out a lot!

Made from a speech given by Quentin L. Cook, "Hope Ya know, We Had a Hard Time"

How have you learned to help yourself be more patient?