Friday, October 3, 2014

No pain, no gain.

Pain.

According to the National Institutes of Health pain "...is a feeling triggered in the nervous system. [It] may be sharp or dull. It may come and go, or it may be constant. You may feel pain in one area of your body, such as your back, abdomen or chest or you may feel pain all over, such as when your muscles ache from the flu."

They go on to describe that pain can be beneficial, as it helps you identify and treat a problem which may have otherwise gone unnoticed.  Once the root cause is addressed though, the pain usually goes away.

Wonderful.

You may be wondering, "Why is Elder Horowitz talking about pain right now?"

I thought you would never ask.

I have had the opportunity to experience pain over the past couple of weeks.

No, not a spiritual pain for the sins of the world, not the mental anguish of sin, just your regular, everyday, old-fashioned, physical pain.

In VERY large amounts.

Story time:

I have a history of pain in my legs. That history came back to haunt me about a month ago...(Yes, I know, it's quite the delay but I am also working as a full-time missionary, which takes a lot of time.)  Throughout that day, the pain in my knees had been getting steadily worse. I took some ibuprofen and hoped it would go away or lessen to a more manageable level, like it usually does.

But it didn't, it got worse, till I couldn't bear it any longer. The pain felt like tiny knives jabbing underneath my kneecap every time I moved.

Which resulted in me having a late-night ER visit with one of my companions.

Not fun for him. I have picture evidence!~


Long story short:  I spent eight hours in the ER for a 20 minute visit, a couple x-rays, and for them to tell me I needed to see an orthopedist.  A week later, my appointment with the orthopedist came through and he told me I had Patellar Tendinitis.  Something which indicates poor muscles around the knees, which might explain the whole 'chronic knee pain' thing.

Well, if nothing else, it was a good experience and I managed to talk to a few people about the gospel!~

Thinking back on it, though I'm still feeling some pain in my leg, there are many ways this character building experience can be applied to the gospel, but the one that I would liken it unto would be this:

Repentance.

That's a big word.  It's a scary word for some people.

But it's not supposed to be.

Pain can follow a variety of different paths but when we sin, we feel guilt for what we have done.  I like the way that a certain Elder put it in his medical parable (which is beyond compare) that you can read here,
"Sin is the medical term we use for both the cause, and symptoms of 'Imperfectia.' The first time you exhibit an imperfect attribute, behavior, or tendency, and allow that to influence your decisions, it is a sign of a spiritual malfunction that is inherent with humans. In short, when you give in to weakness, and either do something wrong, or fail to do something right, it damages your spirit and the scar tissue causes you pain. This pain is known as "guilt."

"I feel fine now though, are you sure it isn't gone?", you respond.

"Unfortunately, it's not that simple. With something like high blood pressure, which can be triggered by a lack of exercise, its effects can be reversed when you begin exercising again. But once you've contracted Imperfectia, you cannot be cured by resuming a good life. Unless every element if imperfection in you is eliminated, your spirit will continue to have occasional failures, which will in turn lead to more pain."
Though sometimes, I feel like I've gone beyond, the pain reminds me that it's still there.

If it's not treated by repentance, confessing and forsaking said sin, then it festers until it becomes a gaping wound. 

Unless I start ignoring it, thinking, "It's not too bad, I can manage with this."  The sin holds me back and eventually, I forget about it.  I begin changing my thinking to accommodate,


"This is normal"

"This is the way things are."

The pain which was once NOT normal, which I had avoided, becomes a part of me and I begin to not want to part with it. It becomes part of my identity and I don't know what I would do without it.  I become dependent on it.  It becomes my crutch.  I no longer am free and I hobble around yelling to everyone, "This is the way I am!"

Sometimes, life forces us down, shoving us to the ground.  We feel like our enemies surround us and we have absolutely no way out.  Occasionally, all we can do is let ourselves be taken down.

I remember, this one video game, Final Fantasy VII: Crisis Core the main character Zack Fair was trying his best to save a friend and get back to those he cared about.

***Spoiler Alert*** (If you care)


"Those wings... I want them too..."-Zack Fair
He succeeds in saving his friend, yet he gets critically injured.  He'd been trying so hard to become a hero to his friends and those around him, but life had shut him down.

As he was lying there dying, he saw his mentor, teacher, and friend, Angeal(who had died previously) flying in the sky.  All he could do was look up and say, "Those wings... I want them too..."

*** End Spoilers ***

When we're on our back, we look upward, seeing those who are free and, like Zack, we want that freedom.

We want to be free from the confines and the constant struggle of trying to survive(At least that's how I feel sometimes).  For me that freedom is found in the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
"Every soul confined in a prison of sin, guilt, or perversion has a key to the gate. The key is labeled repentance. If you know how to use this key, the adversary cannot hold you [down]. The twin principles of repentance and forgiveness exceed in strength the awesome power of the tempter."  -Boyd K. Packer  "Cleansing the Inner Vessel"
Because we are imperfect, in this life we have pain, and we can either let that pain rule us and force us down a path we don't want to go, or we can learn and grow from that pain, trying to forsake our sins and bad habits and become better than the man(or woman) we were yesterday.

When we use the Atonement of Jesus Christ to turn that pain into progress, we take advantage of an infinite power source to carry us further in our own goals.





Yes, I know, this is meant to motivate us to work out, but I would liken it to spiritual growth.

That guilt we feel doesn't need to hold us back. We can learn from it, forsake it, then flex our spiritual muscles and prepare to fly. We don't need to be earthbound. We're children of a HEAVENLY FATHER.  Why let our sins and our pain hold us back?

I admit, sometimes, it's not that simple. There are some things which we cannot change, there are some things which are natural or inborn, within us...

But do we give in to our desires? Do we throw discipline out the window? If our physical muscles are screaming for relief but our workout set isn't done, do we stop?

Or on the flip-side, if my knee is damaged do I keep using it as I had, before it is healed and risk further injury?

If there's anything that I know I have a testimony of, it's that Jesus Christ has felt everything that we have and can help strengthen us in our weakness if we let him.

All we need to do is ask.  

If you feel like you are too unworthy to ask, too scarred by past mistakes, too far gone, or even just scared for whatever reason, remember this little quote from one of our Apostles,

Taken from his talk, "Like a Broken Vessel"


To Learn more about Jeffery R. Holland, click here!~

To learn more about Boyd K. Packer, click here!~